There are hundreds of reasons why I am choosing to have a homebirth. It is the safest option for me.The decision is not monetary, it is not out of fear, and it is certainly not out of ignorance. I am choosing to have a homebirth because I have faith. That is the core of my decision, faith that God made me with the ability to birth a child. Faith that I can tolerate the pains of labor. Faith that the process is natural and that it needs no intervention.
As a doula, I listen, I see and I have personally experienced the pressure women in our society go through to have a baby. The entire event is fear driven, and in that fear our control is stolen from us without most of us noticing. Women are afraid to give birth, afraid of the pain, afraid of the pressure from society. We just do what everyone else does because it is "best". Most people do not know that there is better. There is so much psychological damage there that I cannot even begin to address. I just know that I have dealt with mine and I am not afraid to trust the Lord and in the ability he gave me to produce and birth a seed.
When I got pregnant with my first child I went through the normal channels at first. I had wanted to be an OB after all so I was excited to get to experience what I would be living with everyday. I hated the very first visit. I didn't even know for sure I was pregnant yet, I hadn't even seen the doctor and I was already hammered with setting up a payment schedule. Wait a minute, I haven't done anything but peed on a stick, you don't even know if I am really pregnant, its already about money? YUP! That’s it, it's all about money. I didn't know this then but the average hospital birth costs $10,000. The more they "do" the more money doctors and hospitals make. And did you know that most of those things that they are doing, generally lead to a c-section. Do you know how much a c-section costs? About $20,000 or more. Thank God, I went to the hospital to get induced, because my baby had low heart rate and couldn’t tolerate labor so we had to have an emergency c-section. I am not putting down women that have had this experience all I am saying is that it happens everyday. We never stop and think, ya know maybe that Pitocin made my babies heart rate slow. 35% of women had a c-section in 2007, that is more than 1 in 3 women. This number is only getting higher.
Sorry, I will get off my soapbox and back to my story. I switched my care to a midwife after my second doctors visit. The care was night and day different. I felt like a person, like someone cared about me, like someone knew that there is a beautiful miraculous thing about birth that should be cherished. That is how I felt after all, I just wanted to be cherished and respected as a person. I read countless books on birth; The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth (Henci Goer), Spiritual Midwifer (Ina May Gaskin), The Birth Book (Dr. William Sears), Your Birth Your Way (Sheila Kitzinger), Gentle Birth Choices (Barbara Harper). I scoured the internet, I read every article on birth I could find, I got as much under my belt as I could. I had planned a birth at a birth center, but had to switch care just a few weeks before I was due, to deliver at the hospital, because our insurance would not cover the birth center and we had not made plans to pay for it previously. I didn't take the change in plans lightly, I had done my research and knew that I had to have the right people around me in order to have my wishes respected. I would still be attended by the midwife but I needed someone that could remind me of what I wanted, so I hired a doula.
I had a decent hospital birth
story here. I had my daughter naturally but it was not without a fight. I still had to "conform." There were things that I DID NOT WANT that were forced on me for just in case. I still resent some of those comments, I still had too many checks for how long I was there and I still had to do what someone else told me for most of my labor. The delivery went beautifully. She was born no more then 5 hours after we walked in our room and I was told I was 1-2cm. The lights were off, everyone was calm, I was screaming to my hearts content and my body pushed her out on its own. There was no 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 and again. No one whisked her away, she stayed with me as long as I wanted her to. I still hated the hospital stay, I really just wanted to be in my own bed, not having people come in my room every 2 hours to "do" things. I hated being told I couldn't leave until this, this, this, this and all of that happened.
This time will be different. I will be in my own home, with my own germs, in my own bed, surrounded by my family, the way we all started. I will be in whatever room I want to be in, eating whatever I want, moving however I want, moaning however I want. I will be safe and I will have faith. I know I can have a natural birth, that is not a concern, I did it before and I am excited, thrilled even to do it again. I have a licensed midwife whom, I love and will be apprenticing for when this baby is older. She will bring with her sterile gloves, scissors, oxygen tank with masks for mom and baby, suction tubes for the baby, doppler, blood pressure cuff, stethoscope, pitocin for post-partum hemorrhage, herbs to stimulate labor if needed, herbs to ease pain if needed, amniohook, bulb syringe, baby scale, vitamin k, eye ointment, hep b vaccine, gauze, local anesthetic, IV fluids, urinary catheter, suture thread and needles, tracheal tubes, cord clamps, forms and charts, baby hat, measuring tape, an assistant or student midwife and I even have to order a kit with more supplies. My doula will be here to make sure everyone is happy and coping well, she will bring heat pads, essential oils for aromatherapy, soothing music, guided imagery cards, massage tools, the birth pool, and many other knick knacks and odds and ends that we don't think we need but she has. We are prepared, and in the event of a true emergency, life or death, we will go to the hospital and use it for what it is for and I will be grateful to have it then. The hospital will always be there in case of emergency or illness, its 10 minutes away.
As of right now I am the perfect picture of a healthy normal pregnancy. The same was true of my previous pregnancy. There is no emergency, there is no illness, I am having a baby. That's what every woman on this earth did before I got here. We just had babies. Now babies have become big business. My homebirth will only cost $2,000 for everything since I am paying in advance, it would be $4,000 otherwise. Even at $4,000 its less then half the amount of a hospital birth. You would think insurance companies would be all over this. But I was told by the HR Manager at Larry's job, they would have to look into this as I am the first person to use a midwife. The quality of care is superb. When I walk into my midwifes office there is not a wait. My appointment is at the time we set it for, and I spend about 30 minutes to an hour there, but that time is all devoted to me. We talk about how I am feeling, what I want for the birth, we get to know each other, we joke, we share birth stories (since were both in the business), yes we listen to the babies heart and all that other stuff but I am cared for, really and truly. I really appreciate that quality of care, how many of us like waiting in waiting rooms for 45 minutes for a 10 minute appointment, that should have been a half hour ago?
So for me homebirth is the safest choice. When pregnant women step into hospitals uninformed and mis-educated, they are being taken advantage of. You will remember your births for the rest of your life. You will tell your children's birth stories to strangers when they are little and to them when they are older. Words cannot express the empowerment and the feeling of being an overcomer that I have after my daughters birth. I am a strong woman of God and it saddens me that most women have this feeling stolen from them and they don't even know they were supposed to have it. I do not even remember the pain of labor, all I remember is how happy I was that my daughter was born and how much energy I had right after her birth. I cannot wait to do it again, this time surrounded by the people and the place that means the most to me.
I didn’t want to bog this down with statistics. It also turned out to be a lot longer than I anticipated. But I know that there are many other women who understand what I am trying to say, but there are even more that have no idea. And when you are passionate about something its hard to keep this all bottled up. I just came across a blog post today that sort of inspired me to do this now. Check it out
http://raving-liberal.livejournal.com/826262.html. Please post comments and if you would like more information. You can find other statistics in the book Pushed by Jennifer Block, the Thinking Women's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer and by seeing films such as The Business of Being Born and Pregnant in America.
There will be a screening of Pregnant in America (Michael Moore-esque documentary) this Thursday, February 5 at Wildflower Diapers in Scottsdale at 6:30pm if anyone is interested in tagging along with me. I also have The Business of Being Born at my house if anyone wants to drop see it. It is on Netflix as well. Let me know what you think and send it to those whom you think want to know.
Labels: homebirth
